Humor Heals; Rhonda’s Encouraging Words for Breast Cancer Patients
Artists Making Creative Coping Possible
As always, with this being creative coper and all, I asked Rhonda about what if any creative outlets she said she used while going through treatment and I am so glad I asked.
She spoke beautifully about how an artist touched her life at this time saying, “Nearly everything crafty (which I typically enjoy) was just too overwhelming to me or I didn’t have the energy to do it. I did, however, appreciate the artistic talents of others. I have a friend who is a photographer and he told me to pick any photograph from his site and he would send me a print free of charge. I selected a calm beach scene from a place he had traveled to. I had it framed and hung it next to my bed so I could look at it and imagine being there smelling the salty air, hearing the waves, seeing the breeze sway the palm tree leaves. It was, even if for just a moment, a nice little escape from the reality of my sickness and pain.”
Simple Acts That YOU Can do
Going along with this idea, I also asked Rhonda what people could do if they wanted to reach out and help (especially with it being October, breast cancer awareness month).
Rhonda says, “Please take them meals. Drive through food, take out food, a fruit or veggie platter…anything! Mealtime is something that has to happen but is probably the most overwhelming to accomplish for someone sick with no energy. Some days just standing at the sink to brush my teeth took so much out of me, I couldn’t even dream of trying to stand in front of a stove and try to make a meal for my family.”
“Another thing I’d like to mention is that all of the ‘awareness’ campaigns are sort of a double edged sword. While it’s nice that so many people buy and wear products to show support, we should also know where our money is going when purchasing these products.”
A Stunning Change of Perception
Rhonda has such a beautiful take on life and has come a long way with her positive attitude. She told me, “Unless you’ve known me for a long time you wouldn’t know that I used to be an inactive, very heavy-set woman that had no clue how to eat healthy and hated exercise. In the last several years, I had learned how to make long-term diet changes that didn’t feel like deprivation and I also learned to absolutely love running, hiking, and being outdoors in the sunshine when we get a little reprieve from the blistering heat here in in Arizona.”
Post -Treatment Efforts
“Even now, post treatment, I have to focus on healthy coping skills. There’s a very real chance my cancer could return at any time and if it does I will then be considered incurable. I try very hard to keep my mind on the present and the very near future because it’s all that I can be sure of. Thinking ahead to all the what-if’s brings nothing but anxiety and sadness so it’s a constant daily effort to mentally stay in the here and now.”
“I ask myself what I can do to feel happiness today, and I try to do those things. I want to take the trips *now* and stop putting off everything to some date in the future that I may or may not live to see.”
Meet the Whettens
Rhonda says along with her connections to her online community and her amazingly cute dog Lucy (who I got to meet briefly) that her family is what makes her the happiest.
“I have a husband, six kids, a son and daughter-in-law, and two grandkids that are so much fun to be around. I’m happiest when we are all in one place laughing and being our goofy selves!”
One of my favorite things Rhonda’s family did for her that shows their true sense of humor was the signs they made for her before her double mastectomy. You have to have a sense of humor through the hard times, right?
Setting Goals Every Step of the Way
Rhonda not only has a positive attitude but shows ambition as she is gearing up for getting back to certain things that her body is not letting her get to just yet.
“Going on a solo hike is therapeutic and so beautiful to me. I feel a special, quiet happiness when I get to enjoy the things I love. I feel absolute joy and an overwhelming sense of peace when I get to the top. I haven’t been able to get back to this since treatment, due to some lingering side effects, but I look forward so much to the day that I can!”
From One Cancer Patient to Another
Rhonda would like to say:
“It’s important to connect with other women who have already gone through it. They can give advice that Dr’s neglect to mention and they can reassure you when you are terrified of what’s to come. I would tell them that there is hope(!!). It’s all so overwhelming and frightening but as one survivor told me when I was just starting out I will tell others, ‘It was hard, so very hard, but I got through it and SO WILL YOU.’”
