Ride the Wave Wherever it Takes you and Vocalize Fears Along the way
Trying New Things Without Fear
Danielle shared with me how she’s proud of not only how far she has come in terms of her art but in terms of her long-boarding, saying, in reference to both:
“If I try something new and it works out really well it’s like a pivotal moment for me and it feels good.”
I don’t know about you but I definitely let anxiety build up before trying something new at times. I like to research anything new before trying it, even going to the point of watching Disneyland rides on Youtube before venturing on them, (anyone else weird like me?)
In my interview with Danielle she spoke of her opinion of trying new things which was exactly what I needed to hear:
“Don’t expect the worst, expect things will go well, until they don’t which is unlikely to happen.”
“Go in with a Positive mindset and attitude, good things will come your way, if you treat people well they’ll treat you well back.”
I also think it is important to be vulnerable and to remember that it is okay to express to others that, hey, this is new for me and I’m excited about it but also kinda nervous.
I think that anyone who cannot appreciate raw vulnerability from you isn’t someone you want sticking around anyway, right?
Vulnerable story ahead:
I recently got talked into canoeing though I called kayaking because it was just as terrifying to me (you can laugh, it’s cool, I laugh at my irrational fears often)
I’m not quite sure why but water makes me nervous, like, it makes this abyss of anxiousness bubble up inside of me and so I often, (always) stay away from water related activities (outside of showering because I believe in personal hygiene)
Chandler Bing Coping Mechanisms 101
I stepped into this canoe and felt paralyzed with fear which I’m pretty sure was visible to everyone around me even though I tried to laugh it off as my sarcastic self usually does.
Not only was I already out of my comfort zone but I was in the front and center of this canoe, directly in front of our tour guide (shout out to Kevin)
As we started rowing Kevin turned to me and was like, “Look kid, you’re front and center you’ve got to row” and immediately I was like, “Hell no. I don’t have to row Kevin, love you but get off my back.”
Expressing Anxiety
No, but really I took the opportunity to be vulnerable as I shook my head with eyes wider than Bambi’s at the sound of gunfire and said, “I’m currently terrified and just going to need a minute.”
I’m sure he thought I was ridiculous as anyone outside of my situation without this anxiety of water would, but he seemed to at least attempt to understand after I shared that.
At the end he asked me if I at least enjoyed my experience to which I could only reply, “I’m not gonna lie to you Kevin” before stepping out of the canoe.
Vocalizing Fears and Vanishing Misconceptions
Which, by the way, if for some reason Kevin is reading this (my tour guide from Cali not Portland where I ironically had a second tour guide on the same trip named Kevin) thank you for understanding and my sympathies go out to you for probably not being paid enough to deal with people like me. (Good thing I’m one of a kind right?)
Even though I was terrified, I am now A.) laughing at myself, wishing I had footage of this canoeing endeavor and B.) proud of myself for not only participating but vulnerably vocalizing my fears.
I think this experience would have been 200% more scary had I kept my needs bottled up instead of expressing them and letting those around me know why I was slow to participate.
It eased myself but also those around me and maybe directed them away from thoughts of, ‘wow she is lazy’ and instead let them know, ‘wow she has an irrational fear of canoeing and I’m gonna try to not be an ass about it.’
Young and Unwittingly Wise
As I had this experience I held onto Danielle’s words “Things will either go well until they don’t which is unlikely to happen” and was able to meditate out of that paralyzing fear.
How likely was it that the canoe full of mostly confident people was going to tip?
How likely is it that we wont gain at least one thing (even if it is a cheap laugh or confirmation of initial fear) from trying something new?
As someone who tends to be an apprehensive hermit, I’m honestly grateful to have met someone as bold, confident, and brave as Danielle to share her wise words with me.
